"Impressive or Impressed?"

I was struck this Sunday, as we were out of town and visiting a church, how much the message related to things I have been learning lately - about myself, and about how I view myself and what it says about my worship.

The sermon was based off of John 3:27-30, which says this:

John answered, "A person cannot receive even one thing unless it is given him from heaven. You yourselves bear me witness, that I said, 'I am not the Christ, but I have been sent before him.' The one who has the bride is the bridegroom. The friend of the bridegroom, who stands and hears him, rejoices greatly at the bridegroom's voice. Therefore this joy of mine is now complete. He must increase, but I must decrease." (emphasis added)

The pastor asked the question: "Is the aim of your life/day/moment to be impressive, or to be impressed?"  He also asked how we define success.  I thought I had a good definition of success, that was certainly not based on money...but it was actually misguided in other ways.  I judged my success based on the grades I made and whether people like me.  Those are not necessarily bad things, but I was focused more on my own honor (or lack of it) than on Christ and what He did for me.  I was more inwardly focused than Christ-focused. 

Verse 27 says that "a person cannot receive even one thing unless it is given him from heaven."  Whatever intellectual ability I may have, and whatever qualities I have that may make me a good friend - I received them all from the Lord.  Yet I have taken personal pride in such things, instead of thanking God for His grace in my life.  I want my joy to be complete in Him - simply (wonderfully!) in Him.

I must share a few more quotes - from the pastor and from others that he quoted.  1) The pastor said that "the fight of the Christian life is not to become stronger or better or faster, but rather to become peripheral in your own existence."  This is what I want - to become focused on Christ.

2) From Martin Luther: "It is certain that man must utterly despair of his own ability before he is prepared to receive the grace of Christ."

3) And this delightful one from John Piper: "They showed me that the highest mental health is not liking myself but being joyfully interested in everything but myself. They were the type of people who were so amazed that people had noses - not strange noses, just noses - that walking down any busy street was like a trip to the zoo. O yes, they themselves had noses, but they couldn't see their own. And why would they want to? Look at all these noses they are free to look at! Amazing. The capacity of these men for amazement was huge. I marveled and I prayed that I would stop wasting so much time and so much emotional energy thinking about myself."

And this is my prayer as well...that I will "stop wasting so much time and so much emotional energy thinking about myself."  I want to be amazed by others and look toward Christ and live in worship, instead of always thinking about how I measure up and trying harder to be what I think other people want me to be, and so always feeling like I've failed.

This may seem like nothing new to some people, but it was a big eye-opener for me, and it also helped to set me free a little.  I feel less of a burden to try to be "somebody," and more free to simply be and to worship the Lord.